Grand Safari

Posted: August 21, 2012 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , ,

beach was hot

sand clung to toes

open tailgate,

back of station wagon,

an old worn blanket

Benchley and cummings

pushed aside

she lay back

as with cheap beer

washed her toes,

our laughter not so bright,

our days not so long,

we lit up and smoked

sweet compression

of moments,

8 track finished,

radio on,

i could not find the


as she stripped off bikini

pulled on

t-shirt and cut off jeans

that hold her form

and sculpture,

when i spoke murmured

as if keeping my words

to myself,

she knew this and barely

could reply,

i wanted the night

as it would bring tomorrow,

maybe that would be


once sandals where on,

she gulped down more

warm beer,

nodded in confirmation

as the radio broadcast

the news,

she said au revoir with


  1. Mama Zen says:

    “we lit up and smoked
    sweet compression
    of moments”


  2. Let’s hope she didn’t flash V-for-victory signs as she grinned maniacally and helicoptered away! LOL

    The impressionistic nature of this one, telling us just enough about the things in their lives to portray a whole time and lifestyle, was quite enjoyable. Especially for anyone who still remembers 8-tracks! And blasting “Can’t Get No… Satisfaction!”

  3. ayala says:

    Good capture….nicely penned.

  4. Well done–I like the sadness in here, barely suggested but pervasive.

  5. Laurie Kolp says:

    Ahh… this is nice. I love the vivid capture of the scene, the contrast of emotions. Enjoyed this!

  6. A very sweet memory, come alive again. I feel like it’s a universal story.

  7. slpmartin says:

    As others have noted..excellent presentation of the scene and emotions…love the title too.

  8. brian miller says:

    you really capture the scene…love the washing of feet with beer…and your own feelings in the moment as she is changing….def some tight emotion underneath this…as she leaves….felt man…

  9. coconutspeak says:

    Brilliant! You never let me down, my dear Brit friend.

  10. Kumar Gautam says:

    Emotional and picturesque…loved it 🙂

  11. ManicDdaily says:

    Wonderful sense of the time and station wagon. (Ha!) No, but this was very evocative to me, and you’ve done it so very sparely and suggestively–never overstating. Really very very nice.

    One typo – I’m sorry – but I’d want to know – I think you mean, once sandals were on, instead of where on–(I think)–

    I love the way the jeans sculpted form – you put it so well. k.

  12. Nice painting of the scene….her leaving and his reluctance ….just the right capture of emotions ~

  13. Claudia says:

    great capture of the scene and those emotions, lots of emotions, some not even really palpable for them but you made them not only visible but feel-able

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s