Internalise

Threads of thought
snagged on my tongue,
unable to utter
even with a mumble
that I was admitting
a failure to remember,
days became clogged arteries
harder the restriction
the more I struggled,
had our love
been so nondescript
or was it so great
I blotted it out

illustration 9

ants loud enough

close to his head,

reprieve of summer cool

as he lay under his cart

pushed for close to a mile

finding geography

awkward to place

despite being his city once,

his mind a squoze larvae

thoughts brief as a snakes hiss,

irritable tongue of weeds,

lying still

close to impossible,

underpass old concrete walls

tagged by youth

more used to shooting than talking

overhead cars heat and horses,

smells nasal reverberations

he would feel quieter

if at the bottom of a lake

where on it’s silted bed

with fishes as companions

devouring algae from his closed  eyes,

heat would be gone

and his mind would make sense,

the moon did not bring night rain,

eventually he stood

rocking on heels

than began to walk

this time he would find the start

of his journey

fever on the funship

grampus in my thoughts

vessel resonant to pharaoh’s dance

from a bitches brew,

no mirror

no media

in any sarcasm would find me

i would smoke

i would dance,

old hulk decks creaking

as my silk collar shines,

from cabin to hold

the merriment stretches,

i would distance myself

and not be portrayed

anonymous to all but the

lips and tongue i entwine,

whiskey manufactured in the south

smoky sweet tingle,

it was migration

or mitigation

of many ravenous appetites

bologna sausage and sweet mutton,

so vibrantly lost

room extended that i was hidden

faceless in the extreme,

music of davis found me

wanting more,

gilt frame my hair once neatly combed,

come grampus

tilt on rolling waves,

find me a place

of nonchalant obscurity,

saxophone and drum

the ariel had been lost

it was memory that

dragged me down

into the depths

that would fill my lungs

with salt water,

careful heart placement

extracted blood from veins

i was infused with a rhythm

that could only lead to one conclusion

i was intimate in my body

with all of one species,

more smoke

more mirrors,

hearing snare and guitar

long days vanished

a place found

yet i could not reveal

who i totally

am

 

René Magritte not-to-be-reproduced-1937

magpie tales statue stamp 185